Just came home; it’s been a long day and…a good learning. Learning mostly about people and myself along with the City of course.
It was a happy day and I made it such…well, Starbucks coffee helped a bit.
I have not found any difficulty in following the thought before ideas (some would call it plans – me in the past, not anymore, not in New York…plans are not flexible (they break folded), ideas are). Jogging in the Central Park was surprisingly not… lonely. People everywhere, jogging, walking their dogs, cycling, laying down on the grass, reading, writing, talking…in the morning of the middle of the week. How come?
My friend was drinking coffee over his Mac when I jogged back. It was nice to see him again after all these years…and a bit awkward. Stepping down into his life again, a guest from past or future, same conditions, but surely moved on people. We talked in Esperanto for a while before switching into English. He did not change much, but he changed his work several times. He is still open and kind, the way I remember from 2002. We had Mango Tapioca in Chinatown then and me and my sister laughed a lot without any particular reason…just being happy.
I went to Chinatown again. This time alone. But many things happened before…which all connected to make a circle of the first lesson I had to learn. I sent some time in Barnes and Noble, carefully choosing books (I have made a commitment to finish any of which I buy or borrow – it hurts too much to see books I had and had not opened – they shed a light of slight accusation from the shelves…many many of them, knowledge that has not been acquired) and set for some time in Starbucks studying the people and flicking through some books that did not make it into the purchase. I hurried back through the Rockefeller plaza and into Museum of Modern Art where I scheduled a meeting with my new friend from the airplane and…looking for Dali. Something happened then. I was feeling good a bit hyper…and a bit inquisitive…I felt so much and so deep, I could almost make a physical shape in the air and I could definitely put it in words…I was willing to see if others could…
…she felt pressured and left me on the way to Little Italy where we agreed to have dinner. She got nervous over the late hours, danger in Subway, her intuition dragged her back home, and mine led me forward… Was I disappointed? Not much, just pensive...We are social animals and are psychologically interconnected…we influence each other, we create connections, invisible platforms which should be comfortable for both parties… I build my side too fast and too high…she slipped away. People do not like to be pushed…most of them, I do since it turns my engine on… and I am not used to slowing down for people, I wonder why, since so many stopped for me.
So I was alone in the East Village heading to Chinatown. I decided to be open for experiences and they did not make themselves wait for too
long. I had wonderful conversations sitting at the bar under the red lanterns. I got priceless lessons which I would not want to erase by no means. Here is the question though - if I would not have been me – pushy and demanding would this had happened? Would I meet the right for the moment people? … let them share the thoughts that make the bricks in my foundation? I am falling asleep now, after the day, that hold month’s experiences and year’s emotions.
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